Failing to find a fantastic time at college? Many share your feelings.
A student named Robert spent most of his first week at university looking at online platforms, reading posts about peers enjoying evenings out.
"I remained in my room," Robert explains, describing the week as the most solitary phase of his life.
His housemates rarely went out, and his studies didn't appear very sociable.
Despite putting himself out there by going to taster sessions for various societies, he didn't discover like-minded individuals.
"I began losing my confidence," he says. "I believed people didn't want to form friendships with me, or they didn't like me."
Social Media Comparisons
Initially, Robert didn't plan of going to university and had a job offer for after sixth form.
Yet he saw his friends enjoying themselves as students on Instagram.
"When you must rise for employment on weekdays at 9:00 and you notice others went out on Wednesday night, you do start thinking others have it better," Robert explains.
Higher Education Assumptions
Media content and digital networks can glorify the idea of university living.
Lots of people arrive at college with strong assumptions for what they believe could be the most wonderful time of their lives.
Various learners come to university with "rose-tinted glasses," says a support services coordinator.
Study Outcomes
- Through surveys of new students initially, the primary worry was belonging and being accepted
- Additional research through polling organizations, 17% of students said they were without companions at university
- Over one-third reported they experienced concern frequently about forming friendships
Personal Experiences
Alisha Miah's TikTok feed was full of videos of girls having fun while living together in college residences.
Yet when she relocated from her hometown to university to learn reporting, she found orientation period "intense" because of the substance involvement it involved.
Alisha doesn't drink and had avoided party scenes before.
"I actually passed considerable time initially inside my accommodation," she says. "I just felt a bit alienated."
Psychological Aspects
In a 2025 survey of over ten thousand undergraduate students, a significant portion mentioned they had considered leaving university.
The main cause was their mental and emotional health, followed by monetary worries.
"Concern over all of these different things is extremely prevalent, and expected," adds a mental health professional.
Finding Solutions
Over periods, Robert, Alisha and Christina all found their feet and built connections.
She formed relationships through her course and via social media, while the individual experienced improvement after being able to move in with friends.
Useful Suggestions
For Robert, now 24 and in his concluding studies, it was engaging in performance groups and getting a part-time job that supported social connection.
Robert's advice to new attendees experiencing connection challenges is to simply leave your accommodation and go to club and society taster events.
"Following several weeks of continuous participation, others notice your presence," Robert says, "you recognise theirs, and you start making friends."